Returning to school can be challenging in any given year, especially with the uncertainty we’ve all experienced the last few years and when your child is living with an eating disorder. In this blog post, we’ll talk about what your child can expect when returning to in-person learning, how they can cope with the transition, and how you can help as a parent.
COVID-19 and Eating Disorders
Unfortunately, COVID-19 has changed all of our lives. There has been an increase in eating disorders since the beginning of the pandemic. This increase may be due to a variety of factors such as the increased use of social media and increased isolation during the pandemic.
Folks living with an eating disorder prior to the pandemic have been forced to adapt. Eating disorder treatment has shifted online for many folks and wait times for in-patient programs have also increased.
What to Expect When Returning to In-Person School
As we talked about above, going back to school in any given year can be tricky! In the last few years, your child may have had a combination of virtual and in-person school. You can expect that returning to school this year will be challenging for your child, and the challenges your child faces may be different than in other years. Be patient and give yourself and your child grace as you navigate the return to school together.
How Schools Can Support Mental Health
There are numerous ways your child’s school can support their return to school and their eating disorder recovery. The school can meet with you, your child and their treatment team to determine the best way to support your child.
Mealtimes at School With an Eating Disorder
It’s important to work with your child’s treatment team to determine the level of support your child needs. Depending on where your child is in eating disorder recovery, they may require meal support at lunchtime. This may include working with the school to arrange meal support with a guidance counselor or planning to pick your child up from school to eat lunch together.
If your child is following a mechanical eating plan, they may also need snack breaks. Since some schools only have lunch breaks, you can work with the school to arrange that your child can take breaks for snacks if needed. You could also work with a dietitian to brainstorm quick and easy snacks that can be eaten on the go.
Exemptions From Gym Class
If at this stage of recovery your child is not allowed to exercise, you could work with the school and your child’s treatment team to ensure your child is exempt from gym class. Once your child has been medically cleared to participate in gym class, your child can work with a dietitian to change their meal plan to ensure their nutritional needs are being met with their increased physical activity levels.
Some classes focused on health/nutrition may also be triggering for your child. For example, your child should also not be weighed, for any reason, as a part of one of their school classes. If your child finds a class or topic discussed in class triggering, they could try to switch out of the class or do other activities when triggering topics are discussed.
Keep reading to find out some coping skills your child can use when navigating back to school.
Comparing Ourselves to Others
In the past year, your child has likely had less of a chance to socialize with their peers in person. Instead, your child may have spent more time socializing with them on social media. Social media does not represent real life, and folks’ appearances and behaviours may have changed since the beginning of the pandemic!
We often say social media is a ‘highlight reel’ or ‘smoke and mirrors’ of our real lives. So, when your child returns to in-person learning this year they may experience heightened comparison-making, based on the Social Comparison Theory. As a parent, you can talk to your child about this so that they can anticipate the feelings/emotions that may come up with the transition back to school.
Social Comparison Theory
The Social Comparison Theory says that we compare ourselves to others in order to assess our appearances or behaviours. When we notice a difference between ourselves and others, we may make changes to our appearance or behaviour. It is also more common for folks living with eating disorders to engage in body-related social comparisons.
For example, one day we may notice that a lot of our classmates wear necklaces every day. The next day, we may decide to wear a necklace like our classmates.
How Can We Stop Comparing Ourselves to Others?
When your child is engaging in body comparison, we recommend that they interrupt the behaviour.
Here are a few ways your child can interrupt eating disorder behaviours at school:
1. Using Coping Skills
Your child can use coping skills to interrupt eating disorder behaviours at school, such as comparing themselves to others. Examples of coping skills include:
- Square Breathing
- The Dive Reflex
- The 54321 Technique
- Butterfly Hug
This list does not include every coping skill, and we encourage your child to use any coping skill that works for them. We go into detail about each of the above coping skills in our Positive Coping Skills playlist on YouTube.
2. Removing Themselves From the Situation
If your child is in a situation where they are comparing themselves to others or others are comparing themselves to your child, they can remove themselves from the situation. If appropriate, they can politely excuse themselves from the situation. For example, your child can talk to their teacher about excusing them from class or they can change rooms.
3. Fidget Tools
Fidget tools can be a great way to manage anxiety. Most fidget tools are inexpensive, and some can even be found around your home! A fidget device is anything you can use to keep your hands busy. Some of our favourite fidget tools include slinkys, elastic bands and stress balls.
We know how challenging it is for you and your child living with an eating disorder to navigate returning to school. Change Creates Change is here for you. If you are interested in learning more about how you can support your child, click below to register for our free Put the Kettle On Support Group for parents.
